i sat at work with my eyes a little wild, and i pressed into ink:
i mean i do ...
but i don't.
sometimes all we need is a blank page and a question, don't we?
i posted it on instagram and dear friends responded with their most secret hearts ~ the language of dreaming, the language of longing.
isn't tapping that hidden, dangerous, and tender place
the way of life for a warrioress?
over the next few days i scribbled out dozens of prompts. to be honest, i don't know all the answers to them but i want to see what happens when we marinate in (commune)ity.
will you? with me?
i'm thinking about posting one or two a week. these questions are like jump-starts for the heart; some of them pull me right to thin, like my friend says, and i feel vulnerable seeing them on the page, quietly waiting for the answering.
but i think this is the brave thing to do.
::
so, beloveds?
in your deepest heart,
in all your wildest hoping,
with your eyes squeezed tight and lungs gulping air,
what is it that you really
really
REALLY
want?
xo.
I really really want....
ReplyDeleteto be heard
simple
seemingly....
♥
love having you back here
Love and Light
(can we go deep? who is it you wish to be heard by?)
Deleteand thank you. <3
anyone and everyone : )
DeleteI am a messenger...and as such my hearts desire is for the messages I speak to have a home...somewhere safe to land, a welcome ear, heart, thought, mind
I posted today about a shift in perspective that my husband gave me...so now what I really really want probably has changed...maybe I would now way courage...courage to not be so attached to the outcome, courage to speak even if it falls on deaf ears...
lots to think about friend...♥
love and light
This has always been a rugged question for me. It seems to cut me every time... But I agree with you: asking is the brave thing to do.
ReplyDeleteI am just now becoming able to shut out the "what is Right?" echo that ALWAYS follows that forbidden question...so maybe I'll attempt to go there.(again)
"a rugged question" - that is beautifully descriptive Rebekah. I feel the rugged and raw in it too. I hope you'll be able to traverse into it and share what you find. <3
Deletemmmm....yes, that dissonant echo...you are the bravest, you know that? so brave. much love to you. i agree with janae....such a beautiful description.
DeleteI really really really want....
ReplyDeleteto love and be loved and to create uniquely.
{{{love}}}
Deletethis is the deepest soul cry, i think.
i really want to do what is absolutely best for me.. and to be bone deep happy. If i'm peaceful, the people in my life will be. if i let loose and be that self i know i am, they will have seen the "most" of me while letting me keep some of my mystery. I talk big but when it comes down to it, I very rarely actually do what i need to be happy. i survive but i'm not happy.
ReplyDelete<3
ReplyDeleteSomething I've been wondering about myself... So far:
A friend.
College.
<3
DeleteI really really want...
ReplyDeleteclarity
and peace.
And not just in answers but to enter the place with freedom to breathe all my truth in... without guilt.
this is my prayer for you.
Deletexo.
I am so excited about these prompts. I need them more than I can say.
ReplyDeletethank you! you know, they are kind of vulnerable for me too. i'm looking at my list and i don't know all the answers myself...
Deletewhat do i really want? i want a lot of things. i mean, i really want a lot of things. i mean, there are a lot of things i really want. *sigh* where to start? i want to never be afraid again. ever. otherwise, i want a lover, family (of my own, someday obviously)... i want acceptance from my family. i want to never lose my family and my longtime friends. those are the main ones i guess.
ReplyDeletedearest Rachel...acceptance always begins with ourselves...take time to get to know the deepest parts of you, love yourself completely, even the shadows, adore who you are and appreciate the things you offer and the rest will not matter so much and before long your bright light and love will be so infectious your family will not be able to help themselves : )
Delete♥ u
love and light
I needed these particular words, Cat, "adore who you are and appreciate the things you offer and the rest will not matter so much." Thank you. <3
Deletethank you for your kind and helpful words, Cat. <3
Deletei love the (commune)ity here, wrapping rachel up in love.
Delete<3<3<3
a tranquillity that runs deep within.
ReplyDeletei'll answer on my blog too.
i've asked this question to people i meet, or a variant, and it's shocking how difficult it is for most people.
i love the word tranquility...it evokes such serenity and peace.
Deletean unconditional love for myself :: that roots me deep into myself.
ReplyDeletethat tender little seedling is reaching toward light...i have seen it. <3
DeleteI've hesitated to answer because I had to find that honest place inside of me where the true answer was.
ReplyDeletedeep down, I want: to feel loved. to stop feeling shame. to be free of depression and feel happiness again. to be free of all my rules and "shoulds" and old voices in my head and actually live my life.
this is my prayer for you.
Deleteps...it's ok to rebel against the shoulds.
so much love.
i echo heather :: SO excited about these prompts, dear friend. will be contemplating this one. short answer - freedom. i want/need/crave freedom.
ReplyDeletemmmm....freedom is a need like water, air, sunshine, coffee. i pray this for you, friend.
DeleteMore than anything Anything else - I want for my children to feel equally Contented within themselves, in their own skin, and deeply Compassionate for things external to their own experience. I want them to be curious adventures who have powerful instincts. This is what i wish when I blow out my candles.
ReplyDeletethank you for stopping by and for your lovely comment! what a deep, insightful wish for your children. this is a sacred testimony to you as their mother. may all of this be.
Delete<3
I really really want to be a stay at home mommy. Really. And I want it now, before we have more kids; before my sensitive one loses herself; before we start missing each other. Oh, I have all sorts of plans about what I would do with my @home self (these include my creative projects, homeschooling, writing, teaching yoga, etc.), but the main reason that I want to be a stay at home mommy is because of my first born, my little Peacemaker.
ReplyDeletei love how you speak of your firstborn. <3 what a tenderhearted mother you are.
Deletewhat do i really REALLY want...
ReplyDeleteto lose the underlying sadness that follows me around from losing loved ones to death. and to lose the fear that also follows me about losing others, and about starting a family b/c of this. to get back to an innocent place in my heart where i can fully embrace a long lasting deep down soulful smile and happiness, joy, deep belly laughing and uninhibited playfulness that i have lost somewhere along the way in the shadows of this life.
thank you for this love.
i hold these words all tender close. i hope these things for you, too, love. so very much.
Deletei feel like i am sitting in the shadows of your ache, close enough that it spills over me and i can share space with you, and send you love and light ... but not close enough to help take the darkness away. i so wish i could. i wish i had words to help. i know that's not what you're looking for but i wish there was something i could do. you pour out so much...you make this world (and the people in it) brighter and happier and you radiate wherever you are. you need that for yourself and gaahhhhhh....if there was something i could do. but in the meantime, i will sit in the shadows of your ache and hold your hand if you need and keep sending prayers and thoughts and love. so much love.
Unadulterated Joy. So alien to me, but like a drug the few times I have experienced it. Intoxicating! I used to want, happiness, peace of mind, stability, for my children (grown)and my husband, but i am now trying to think about what I really, really want, and this is it, more of it anyway....
ReplyDeletei love that word intoxicating. mmmmm. thank you for stopping by and leaving this shimmering glimpse of your heart! may you stumble into joy around every corner and curve in this sojourn of your life. <3
DeleteI want to be wanted. To be needed. To be used.
ReplyDeleteMany see me as "lacking". Because, I lost my leg. And, use a wheelchair. And, then my breasts. Tho' parts of my physical body are gone... I am Me. With so many Gifts to give and share. I want to Give.